I have no excuse for the absence, besides laziness. Actually, I have been working on getting an online portfolio together. It's time to make enough money so I have more than $25 in my savings account.
Nothing of real importance or fun has happened in the past week or weekend. Read a lot. Went out to dinner a few times. Didn't get much sleep. But nothing worthy of capturing on film.
So, I'll have to take you back.
Waaaay back.
Back in time.
To last weekend.
LABOR DAY! CELEBRATE!
I got no sleep on Labor Day, so work on the 6th was pure hell. I felt like I was hallucinating. I left at 3:30 and tried to go home and sleep before we had to show the apartment, but I ended up staring at my ceiling and twitching instead. So I started cleaning. Maniacally.
But I am getting ahead of myself.
Friday the 2nd, Daddy and I went to Evanston and happened to run into his ex GIRLFRIEND. The one he dated right before he came out. He cheated on her with guys. I wanted to pat her on the head and give her some sort of consolation prize. Then we met up with LL and her work buddies. One of them was a guy saying he was looking for a place to live. We told him to call us. I thought nothing would come of it. I was wrong. He called the next day to come see the place. He did. He loved it. We have a new roommate. So all the freaks from Craig's List, QUIT E-MAILING ME!!!!
Saturday the 3rd, I met up with my buddy Nate from high school. Went to Side Tracks then Casey Moran's. Got free drinks from bartender there that thought I was cute. Thanks, marginally attractive bartender! I'll have to put you in my mental Roladex. I'll pull you out whenever I am low on funds and self esteem.
See you tomorrow.
Sunday was the historic Jimmy Buffett concert at Wrigley Field. Tickets were over $100, so we all did the next best thing. We went to a Buffett-inspired party 300 feet away from Wrigley. It was dope. Everyone was dressed for the occasion. I love stuff like this, because it gives me a chance to dress a part, and I just LOOOOOOVE being someone else.
LL and I, before we raided the margarita jello shots.
Everyone should go and get a personalized shirt made. They are excellent conversation starters! For some reason, the "I Like Bacon" got more attention, but if we were going to a party in Boystown, I am sure all the attention would be lavished upon "sausage."
At this point, LL still looks very sober and slightly annoyed.
Now at this point, LL apparently has absolutely not the foggiest idea where she is or who I am.
Me showing my appreciation to our gracious host.
Pretty sweet shot. I didn't think it would turn out so well.
I walked home alone around 12. Even though I am technically single now, I still did not feel right hooking up with anyone else. Although opportunities presented themselves, I preferred to walk home alone and call Dio. We made plans to see each other sometime in the coming week. And that made me happy.
I muddled through the next few days and then it was H's b-day! Yay! I got her a Swedish massge, a spa pedicure and some jewelry. That girl has done SO MUCH for me, and I wanted to show her how much I love her and appreciate her friendship.
We went to Strega Nona for great Italian and $2 martinis.
No comment.
One big, happy feminine family. For now. It'll be nice to have some testosterone next month when Molly moves out. It'll be interesting, that's for sure. I'll have to be on my best behavior for the first month of two, so as not to scare him off. Take it from Daddy, you don't want to be on my bad side.
The plan was to go to Jet Vodka Lounge (Wow, nice website. That fucking place is not awesome enough to have such a cool ass site!) It is stark white, sterile and cold. The bartenders look hot in their stewardess get-ups, but that doesn't make up for the clientele: anorexic girls in stilettos with capri ripped up jeans, huge belts, wife beaters and enormous designer bags. The guys were all very metrosexual and unattractive. When Joe Perillo II came walking in, I knew it was time for me to go home. He is such a nastygreasy pig and his commercials always make me shudder.
So that's really the last time anything worth writing about happened. I was supposed to go to the Purdue game on Saturday, but those plans got thwarted. I went to Casey Moran's for more free Long Islands. Then my friend Randy called and asked to meet up. We ended up watching Napoleon Dynamite until 4am. Then I had him drive me home. Still can't bring myself to be with anyone else. Besides, Randy is trapped in the friend zone and he will never escape.
Yesterday was nice. Met up with LL and her live-in lover and her various friends and watched football at The Ivy. It was nice to be around some new faces. I enjoyed myself. And almost got hit by a car on the way home. I tripped into the middle of Belmont Ave. Once I started walking and that vodka began circulating more heavily in my blood stream, I actually felt quite tipsy. I am such a light weight.
Ok, I have grown bored with these ramblings.
Actually, the first thing I did this morning was the check if I am on crack or not. I swear I saw some movie lasy night on Oxygen starring Justine Bateman and Liam Neeson.
JUSTINE BATEMAN AND LIAM NEESON.
I only watched it for a minute because I thought I was hallucinating again, but apparently I WAS NOT. Fucking Julia Roberts was in it too!
Took it this morning.
SMOOCHES!!!!