I would be completely remiss if I did not update at all this week, so here I am. Actually, my computer has been a punk bitch since mid last week and I wanted to punt it out the window. But Chester (our IT guy) came in and whipped it into shape. I know how all the brand spankin' new Mac applications and a fast-as-hell-bitchin' ass web browser. I'm a happy little clam. My iTunes now even has a music store, which I will never by anything from since I download for free off LimeWire. If the feds knew the amount of illegal music I have (around 40 GB) I'd be busted for sure. So, ssssh!
So without further adieu, I bring you...
Bethany's Random Musings On A Wine-Soaked Thursday night
Let me preface this by saying I got out a paper and a pen and starting writing in the dark while watching TV and chugging wine. I am having a hard time reading it, but I am trying to write these verbatim. I never knew I posessed the penmanship of a serial killer. Awesome.
#1. Those do it yourself highlights are BULLSHIT! I tried them once and I looked like a fuckin' skunk. No way could they ever turn out streaky and perfect with that wack-ass highlight comb they give you. Asshats.
#2. The Project Runway Reunion delivered like Dominos! I laughed, I cried, I threw up in my mouth a little!
#3. My new updated computer is so amazing, I'd almost have sex with it.
#4. I need some people in my life who'd take me to the Virgin Islands on a random Thursday.
#4. 3 bottles of wine between two people and you ain't even drunk you lush bitch!?!?!?!?
#5. Fly me to the moon. (Huh?)
#6. When people sneeze more than once, I get really annoyed.
#7. My puppies paws are disturbingly big.
#8. Sometimes I see this furry little creature running around in my living space and it freaks me out. (Sidenote: I know this sounds weird, but think about it. We invite little furry creatures into our lives. They aren't our species and can't speak our language. And we pick up their shit.)
#9. I live in a pretty posh apartment compared to the winner of Project Runway. New York sucks. Overpriced bullshit.
#10. Tongues are so odd.
#11. (This one is hard. I think it says...) The movie Aquamarine totally ripped off The Little Mermaid. But it looks pretty fuckin' dumb. (Sidenote: I didn't know JoJo was in this shit! GET OUT! )
And with that, I'm spent. Have a great weekend, ya'll!